the heavy...

Go me.. two posts in two days! Thats a first 

my ritual blogger friends would be pleased :) 

But I thought I would discuss something that has been consuming my life...

Weight... Diet... Health.. YUCK YUCK YUCK  

It all started last november when I got strep throat 

the doctor put me on some steroids to help with the pain,  which made me BLOW UP! 

but at the time i didnt realize it was because of the medicine

plus the treats every single day sure factored in

Anyways...

My face, joints, stomach everything expanded I felt at that time a million pounds heavier then my usual weight, so i started becoming an exercise whore... 

every single day sometimes even twice a day

 well now i have gotten back to my normal weight and 

to my pleasure even lost a few extras but then i realized... 

I've become obsessed with being skinnier I am below what i have weighed for three years now, 

and its still not good enough for me so when will good be enough?? 

When will my skinny become too skinny??

Media, society, friends, everything impacts they way I view my body...

and i have now maintained my weight and i want more

I look at every single girl i pass and decide wether im heavier or skinnier then them..

I judge and evaluate every single person which is awfull but i admit it. 

I need to stop wanting more.. 

i will never have a victoria secret models body... thats unrealistic

I love food way to much!! 

So I've decided to not rely on the number the scale tells me, 

 

but they way i feel 

the way my mom tells me i look, because she is always honest 

and the way my boyfriend tells me i look, 

which is "if you get any skinnier i will not talk to you!" 

I love the way he keeps me in check... 

so anyways.. 

Love your body... Be free... Enjoy the person you are

Dont try to be something you arent or cant be

Life is way too short to be starving

My weekend home...

Once again im home for the weekend....

I can't help myself I miss Braedon too much 

But this weekend definitely was filled with interesting events 

Thursday Night.... 

Braedon and I went on our Valentines Date. 

1st we went and got sushi... Yumm 

and then we went and saw Just Go With It, which was super cute 

Friday...

First went running with my mom... GO ME 

then went to lunch with Marissa and Suzy! I can't 

believe the wedding is so close

Marissa will make a beautiful bride 

Friday Night.. we went to CPK for Chan's birthday 

Then I was deciding what i was going to do for 

the rest of the night, and I eventually Decided to just hang at home 

Topics discussed with my mom and dan...

1. Merkin... Yess a merkin- a toupee for your crotch... HAHA 

2. Hottest NBA players- The decision- Raja Bell <3, and Chris Paul 

3. The Ugliest NBA players- Sam Cassell 

Saturday

Braedon Came over, and we got Rio with my family

then laid in my bed and watched all of the All Star events 

That night we went up to Jesse's House and hung out with friends 

Sunday

My Momma's Birthday we went House Hunting

Gahhh it is soo much more stressful then i though it would be

We found one that I loved, but it needed a little bit of work

Like updating the kitchen, and building a bathroom in the basement

But it was a good location right by a park, and the house

had so much charm and personality

As soon as i find a house i will post lots of pictures 

so everyone can see it's transformation.

Sorry to My friends i didnt see, my weekend was hectic 

but i might be back this next weekend so i hope to see

you soon.... or just come to GEORGE 

where its warm :) 

Love you all